Friday, January 14, 2011

A letter to Mr Ben in Bermtopia.

Dear Mr Ben,

Thank you for your kind offer to have me come live with you. That is SO generous of you considering we just met.

I am a very loyal dog and love My Cushion a lot, so I might have to think about your offer a little.


After careful consideration, and seeing as how you have a lovely range of bedding, futons and chair for me to lounge on, I think I would like to come live with you.

We can make arrangements about the food bit later because I do like a bit of poached chicken, hearts and steak for breakfast. And fresh fruit and vegies of course. 2 treats a day will be ample. If 3 come my way, I won't tell if YOU won't tell.

2 walks a day [guaranteed!] sounds lovely. That's what I'm used to here as well.

It sounds cold in Bermtopia so I will bring my 3 favourite toasty jammies - with the pirate, dog howling at the moon and dog n' bones. They're all I have because it's not too cold here in Sydney. Don't worry, I won't be needing your blue blankie. I have 3 myself - a blue 1, a gaudy checked 1 and a green 1 - that I can pack and bring along. I hope the colours don't clash with your furnishing because that would be awful.

Now that's settled, will you be picking me up from my house? I'm not quite sure where Bermtopia is. If I have to get there myself, please send me a map. I hope it's not too far because I will be walking.

By the way, do you have a dog in the house? If you do, he might have to go [unless he's Very Handsome]. I have a housemate here too and am anxious to experience the life of being An Only Pampered Dog.

I look forward to hearing from you soon. Until then, all the best, Georgia Little Pea Ratatouille Bermtopia.

p.s. Is s-n-o-w good to eat?


If you'd like to read Mr Ben in Bermtopia's kind offer, please go to the comments section of the last post.

If you'd like to meet Mr Ben, click HERE. He's the hairy one.

And, I'm going to dedicate this story to Ms Klune for her comment about comments :)


Team Kenzo said...

And the blog? You forgot the blog!

georgia little pea said...

oh yes, mr kenzo has reminded me that i have a blog!

@mr ben - can you type quite well? please send your resume along with the map. thank you.

Chandra said...

GLP, I have a total crush on Ben! I found him during the top 10 of 2010 blog hop and saw some very handsome photos of him at the beach. If I saw a photo of Ben and Mr. Thumper together, I'd probably pass out with from all the distinguished gentlemanliness. I don't mean to horn in on your plans here, but can you somehow arrange that?

-chandra at DDY.

georgia little pea said...

we must have seen the same photos, ms chandra! that's exactly where we met too. he IS handsome, isn't he?

oh, paws off please :)


Dear Ms Little Pea:

I do not type. Since I am of the Australian shepherd persuasion, I use my Keen Intelligence to telekinetically put words to paper --or screen as the case may be. It's really quite easy once you get the hang of it.

As for your impending visit, we may have One Small Problem. You see, I am The Only Pampered Dog in my household and, at the risk of sounding somewhat churlish, think it might create a bit of tension between the two of us. I already have to share my backyard with the neighbor's cat, Kingston, who feels obliged to visit whenever The Two-legged Pair are out working in the yard. It really is the most vexing of situations.

So, in light of your desire to experience life as an Only Pampered Dog and the fact that I already am one (who would like to retain this status, btw) perhaps we should rethink the move and simply enjoy the scintillatingly cyber correspondence we seem to have established. I do hope you understand.

Your (hopefully) eternal friend,


P.S. We really don't eat s-n-o-w here, but it does serve as a marvelous receptacle for "pee-mail."

P.P.S. Should you decide you'd still like to move to Bermtopia, be prepared to swim as well as walk as we are located in on the eastern side of the great state of Washington in the U-S of A.


Kristine said...

Burn! Poor Georgia, after such a sweet acceptance, to be so rejected so quickly, by the very dog who made the proposal.

Perhaps you are both better off.

georgia little pea said...

boohoo :(

Anonymous said...

A long distance relationship

gets like that.

I love al lthe disclaimers and clauses in the deal.