R_ _ barks at every dog that walks past his house. Sometimes, he scares the humans passing by too. Lately, my out-at-work human started giving him a treat or 2, so he's been much more polite to me.
But today, he jumped up on the railing around his porch and lunged at me as I was walking by. I had the fright of my life. I was on the sidewalk just on the other side of the railing. I jumped up back at him and he bit me in my mouth. There was a lot of blood.
My humans were woozy when they saw the blood and immediately called Dr Dog. Although he was very busy, Dr Dog squeezed me in immediately because it was An E.m.e.r.g.e.n.c.y.
My out-at-work human hurried me over. To my surprise, he just left me there all alone. They put me in a cage. I was scared. I had to wait a long time before someone came to see me. "Can I go home now, please?" I asked, but instead they did something I don't know what, and I went to sleep.
This was after I woke up. I had 5 stitches in my mouth. I don't know what that means. My humans say Dr Dog was very neat and you can't see a thing.
After I woke up, my out-at-work human came to pick me up. I was very glad to see him.
When I got home, I felt all wobbly. I wobbled into the dining room and found a strange human sitting there. He gave me a bit of a fright.
It turned out to be Mr Prab. He's okay. He's staying with us a few days. Maybe he'll cook some special lentils for me.
I felt strangely peckish, so I wobbled into the kitchen to look for some food. But there was nothing to eat. Not even in the bin.
I was about to wobble out of the kitchen when Mr Thumper came over to say, "Hi."
I couldn't believe that I was wobbling more than wobbly old Mr Thumper, so I ignored him, wobbled away and went back to sleep.
After a few hours, I woke up and started to scratch my mouth. It started to bleed again. My humans called Dr Dog to see if they could pick up an E.l.i.z.a.b.e.t.h.a.n Collar for me, but he was already closed for New Year's. They called everyone they knew who had biggish dogs, but no one had an E Collar.
It was late arvo on the last day of the year. All the shops were closed. People were out partying. No one was worrying that there was a dog that needed an E Collar. There was nowhere my humans could go to buy an E Collar. And nowhere they could go to buy stuff to make one either.
My stay-at-home human called this Murphy's Law. I've never met Mr Murphy but he sounds mean.
Being very determined, my stay-at-home human rummaged about until she found a raggy bit of plastic in an old cupboard. She made me this.
It's not beautiful, but it worked. She even put an ouchless bandage on the inside so it's nice and soft for my chin. Sometimes, I quite like my stay-at-home human.
Not to be outdone, my out-at-work human went to Woollie's, which was just about the only place left open, and bought a bucket. He cut the bottom out and made this.
A bucket without a bottom.
It's 11 now. Our Famous 9pm New Year's Eve Fireworks went BOOM! BOOM! at 9. They were very loud because we live close by. I was scared all over again, for the 4th time today.
Luckily, my humans didn't go out tonight because they knew I was feeling poorly. My out-at-work human cuddled me.
He held my ears tight.My stay-at-home human put a towel over me.
After that, I felt much better.
I hope they do that all over again when Our Famous 12 midnight New Year's Eve Fireworks go BOOM! BOOM! at 12.
Mr Thumper's been sleeping out in the backyard all night. I don't know why he's not scared of fireworks. He once went to see them with Mr Piglet, who wasn't scared of them either.
I hope my mouth isn't too sore tomorrow. I'm supposed to be getting fresh lamb for my New Year's Day brekkie. I heard my stay-at-home human ask my out-at-work human if she should feed me oatmeal with angophora honey instead.
That would be an awful way to start the New Year.
I hope you're having a lovely New Year's Eve, and...
A HaPpy New YeAr!