Wednesday, December 5, 2012

Bah, humbug!

Let me be frank. My Typist has no idea what makes a dog happy. Before you go tut-tut, I know it's true because Cushion is always saying so and he is always right.
Look at what she decided to give me for Christmas this year! 
What is it supposed to be?
And what do I do with it?
"You want me to give it a sniff?"
"Why? Did you hide some treats in it?" 
"I don't smell anything."

Finally, I decided it was best to be honest with her.
"I don't mean to be rude, Typist, but I can't believe you thought I'd be excited by this fake tree. I can't pee on it. I can't eat anything on it. It doesn't squeak. And my tail keeps knocking into those balls and glass bits which makes you scream. What good is it to me, a dog?"

And this is what The Typist had to say...

Come on Georgia! 
It took me 6 hours to put up this fake tree and 2 days to recover from my aching back and neck. I wouldn't have bothered but you've never had a Christmas tree! It may even It'll very likely be your last! 
Every dog in the family has had pictures taken in front of this very tree. Jordan and Rufus. Farouk and Jehan. It's tradition!
Wouldn't you like that too? Come on, girl! Let's take a nice Christmas family photo! 

Hah! It'll be a cold day in Darwin when that happens.

I'll say this much. As boring as this pressie is, it's much better than those demeaning antlers she gave me last year.

That's right. Go ahead and laugh.

And you guys wonder why I'm such a grouch.





Karen said...

Where's your Christmas Spirit Miss GLP? I love having the tree up at Christmas, it brings a little cheer to the otherwise dreary outside.

Declan said...

Come on mate; live a little...peeing up your first fake tree could be fun... Deccy x

booahboo said...

Hmmmm... a tree is only good for knocking them over with you know GLP. But you were famous at our bazaar... everyone loved your poster picture. Thank you so very much again and again.. everyone's asking hooooooooooooo is that cute dog with those soulful eyes.. :)

btw.. you CAN still pee on the fake tree.. it works.. Piper has done it before :D i am urmm.. however too well-mannered and behaved to do it.

woofs n licks,

Tootsie said...

Ms. Georgia:

I would not pee on a fake tree either! My mom always tries to get me to pee on the astroturf in the Amsterdam airport, but I refuse.

We don't have any holiday stuff up, considering our move. But Mom is desperately trying to find a tiny tiny tiny Christmas tree that she had for years. It's gone.

You asked about a close-out store recently. It's like a discount store. It's where old food stuff goes to die and then people buy that food stuff before it really dies.

I love your Typist's holiday spirit! Do you think I would work as one of your adorable ornaments?!

Keep on wagging, Georgia! You'll get the holiday spirit soon.


Dexter said...

How we love our humans even though they are hopeless creatures with odd ideas about what is "fun."


georgia little pea said...

You're most welcome MS ANNY! I hope you have a successful campaign x

TOOTSIE, holiday spirit? Bah, humbug! ;)
P.S. Thanks for telling us about the store. That's a great idea. Cushion would love it!

3 doxies said...

We has one of them faux trees up too and we is constantly gettin' yelled at cuz we knocks all da stuff off....uh, hello it has invaded my zoomie area.
But Miss GLP, your tree is purtiers withs a doxie ornament though.
Nows, to get yourself in da Christmas spirit, I want you to makes a Christmas list. And be sures you put Cheetos on theres fur me cuz I has da feelin' I is on da naughty list dis year. Oh and then you just must go carolin'.


What Remains Now said...

I don't know, Georgia. After the reindeer antlers, I wouldn't complain about anything that isn't reindeer antlers. It sure is beautiful and that last picture is so sweet. Hopefully, The Typist will have this out of her system, but that worries me about next year. My suggestion...request a tree again next year. At least you don't have to wear the tree.

Jean said...

Oh Georgia, I do hope there will be other more suitable pressies for you on December 25th! Humour your Typist and you never know what goodies will be your reward.
And let's face it.... a fake tree is much less humiliating than fake antlers.

LetterstoAndrew said...

The tree is very pretty. I have to be careful because I have an ornament chewer. I'll give you one guess.

William the Lurcher said...

I thought you looked very fetching in your headgear last year. (please note - I had antlers too).

Jan said...

Georgia just needs to indulge humans their traditions that make no sense to dogs, but there is usually food involved in any human tradition. So stop being a grouch, GLP. Think of the treats forthcoming...

Kristine said...

Aww, I think I love the last photo best. :-) Georgia looks beautiful in front of the tree and I am so glad you put it up this year, even if you hurt your back in the process. The memories are worth it!

Rose ~ from Oz said...

Oh Ms Pea! Antlers??? the indignities your Typist comes up with, and don't tell me it was Cushions idea because I wouldn't believe you.
Let's be kind Ms Pea, Typist does a mean tree......v.e.r.y. pretty!
And GLP - there will be a treat for you under there v.e.r.y. soon. :)

georgia little pea said...

Hey LORI and KRISTINE, the last piccie is my fave too. ALMOST a family shot ;)

I wouldn't hold my breath MS ROSE. My humans don't even give each other pressies for anything. They missed their own 25th wedding anniversary this year, remember?

Cat and DOG Chat With Caren said...

if ya can't eat it...fuhget about it!

Amy said...

It is a lovely tree! Our is only a tiny table-top version which Ty would gladly pee on if given the chance, even though it's fake. I hope Santa finds your house, dear Georgia.

houndstooth said...

Miss Georgia, here's how it works! You pose in front of the tree and look downright adorable. Then nobody can resist getting you what you want!


2 Punk Dogs said...

The tree is beautiful! Hopefully it will motivate the Typist and your Cushion to get some lovely treats for you. :)
Sorry about last year's antlers, our Mr has banned anything of the sort here, yay!

Kari in Alaska said...

I like your tree a lot

Stop on by for a visit

chandra said...

GLP, you are doing way better than last year. I think dogs around the globe cringe when they see the antler hats! I definitely think you should agree to the family photo ... just put a big offal treat in your mouth right before and smile big for the camera!

Wow, we can almost see your typist the last photo!

-c at ddy.

georgia little pea said...

That's right MS C! Isn't she a horrible big tease? :D