Monday, January 23, 2012

The post with no title because My Typist has a headache and can't think of one.

Everyone in our little home has a job [or 2 or 3] to do. There are [almost] no slackers here.

My primary job is to entertain my humans.

For example, a long time ago last year, one of my best party tricks was this. Some of you might remember it.
It always made my humans smile and they're very sad that I haven't done it since coming home from holidaycamp. What can I say? I must have grown up a lot there.

However, I do have a new party trick that I suddenly thought of just last week! Sorry, My Typist can't seem to embed the video here today [whatever that means]. So if you want to see it, you'll have to CLICK HERE.

This should amuse my humans for at least a month or until the neighbours complain.

Of course, I don't just entertain my humans. That would be selfish. Occasionally, I help entertain guests that drop by [not so many because my humans are not too sociable  shy  not too sociable].

This is Ms Im who came to visit last week.
 "Thank you, Ms Im, for coming to visit My Typist and her stitched-up eye and for the lovely lemon tarts!"

And these are Ms Michelle and Ms Karla.
"Thank you, Ms Karla and Ms Michelle, for coming to visit My Typist and for the homemade soup too!"
I'm very good at entertaining, as you can see. I like this job. It's simple to do and it makes everyone happy.

FOOTNOTE: The human who kicked My Typist in the head didn't come visit but he baked made a vegan raw organic chocolate cake for her.

This is all that's left now.

Although that sounds awful, it was quite yummy. Truly. [At least that's what My Typist said because I'm not allowed chocolate.]

***

My 2nd important role in our little home is as a peacekeeper. How does this work?

Well, when disputes break out, I'm the only one either of my humans will talk to. I can't say I'm too comfortable being caught in the middle like that. I personally don't speak their language too well at all, so communication is patchy at best. But here's what I do to help de-fuse the situation.

I put on my sad face.

These are re-enactments because my humans haven't had a dispute in a long time, at least 2 weeks.
"I am very sad that you're both having a dispute. Please make up soon."

You can see this 1st picture was taken a long time ago when Mr T was still with us. But the expression is exactly what I would use.

Sometimes, my humans can be a bit stubborn. As you may or may not know, it takes a long time for anyone in this country to say "Sorry."

If that happens, I move to my Stage 2 expression. This is a bit more fierce and involves more eyeballing.
"Oi! I don't like this! Stop disputing and get my brekkie!"

Surprisingly, my very basic negotiation technique often works as my humans don't like to see me sad, worried or angry. This is called emotional blackmail. I suspect there is always some kind of emotional blackmail going on in peace negotiations.

***

My 3rd role in the house is especially important on cold days and every other day in-between. This is to sit or lie down on my humans and be their non-microwavable personal heat sac.

This role causes the most friction in our house as I can realistically only be a heat sac for one human at a time. Sometimes, this friction leads to a dispute, in which case I have to simultaneously perform my role as peacekeeper. [Very tricky.]
 "Hurry up and sit down please. I am a very popular heat sac and haven't got all day."
 "Is that good? I bet your thighs are warming up nicely."
"The stuff we dogs have to do to keep our homes happy and harmonious..."

***

Apart from the 3 abovementioned indispensible job functions, I now also go to work with My Cushion.
"Am I going in to the office today?"
"I know it's summer but you're a tad under-dressed for work, don't you think?"

It's only a part-time job, and I go in just once a week. I'm not too sure what my role there is yet as the office is still in some state of flux.

However, I believe it has something to do with walking around and letting people pat me and give me treats, thereby promoting a sense of peace and relaxation in an otherwise stressful environment.

Perhaps I'm supposed to be a therapy dog of some kind like my friends Bert and Blueberry and Bunny.

***

My goodness! This post has taken a long time to write! I didn't realise how many responsibilities I have in this family.

You may now be thinking [or not, as the case may be] - "Poor Georgia. She works so hard. I wonder if her humans are just as useful." 

Well, of course they are! [This statement is entirely my own. It was completely unsolicited and no one has paid me to say it yet.] And I shall tell you what their job functions are tomorrow [or maybe the day after the day after, depending on how busy My Typist is].

Until then x

P>S>  I'm sorry for the lack of a title today. Obviously, someone in our family is not pulling her weight. There will no doubt be repercussions.


40 comments:

karla said...

hello! did you know that while your human was making us coffee, I felt Mr. Rufus walk past my skirt? I said hello =D thank you for having us in your home! someday I hope you meet my dog Bravo, the best frenchie on the planet EVER

georgia little pea said...

Well that's a bit creepy, but I suspect you might be right and he and Jordan are both still keeping an eye on us :)

Patrice and Higgins said...

You have so many jobs!! I really love the sad face one....I am going to have to practice because your is much better than mine!

~Higgins

Mary, Roxy and Torrey said...

I just wanted you to know that I passed the Pawsome Blogger award onto you today. Loved your pictures today, I hope everything is great.

Helen Pavlac said...

You have quite the bark, Georgia! I think it's great that you know how much you are needed in your home. Any argument should get solved after that doleful gaze.

Peggy Frezon said...

You have a lot of important jobs. I am sure that you preform them all exceptionally. I think your people would be very lost without you. Hugs!

Jan said...

Humans seldom appreciate all the hard work that their dogs do. They just see what an easy life the dogs seem to have.

We haven't had any elephant invasions of the house since the guard dogs went on duty. There weren't any before but that is beside the point.

rottrover said...

Georga? Have yo considered entering Mango Minster 2012 in the "Working Stiffs" category?? You'd be a shoe-in! Just sayin'...

-Bart and Ruby

verobirdie said...

What a busy life you have! The sad face is really good.

georgia little pea said...

@Mary, Roxy and Torrey - THANK YOU! That's as lovely as homemade cake and soup!

@Jan - elephant invasions bwah ha ha!!! Good one :)

@Bart and Ruby - I've seen that Mango thing in some blogs but have no idea what it is (we don't usually take part in contests and giveaways because most people don't send prizes to Oz ;) I shall check it out for sure. Thanks for the lead x

Kolchak Puggle said...

You are a dog of many hats Georgia. I am the dispute settler at my house too I usually settle it by doing something bad or funny and by the time my humans are done focusing on me, they forget what they were kvetching about anyways.

Scrappy said...

Our work never ends, does it? It can be so exhausting. I have always said that humans can learn a lot from us dogs....we are way better at forgiveness and keeping the peace , as you say. That looks like interesting cake, by the way! Keep on entertaining the humans, guests ans all of us out here in blogville:)

Pup Fan said...

That's a lot of jobs! Bella has totally taken on a the job of dispute resolution and foot warmer around here. :)

Pamela said...

Georgia, you don't realize how many jobs you have. Honey was really amused by your video. So now, you're an international entertainer.

I hope your Typist feels better soon so she can think of a title worthy of your wonderful posts.

georgia little pea said...

dear Ms Pamela and Honey,

thank you so much for seeing my video. i think you may be the only ones who did. but it's okay. i'm not sure it was the best decision to show the whole world how silly i am :)

melf said...

Why has it taken me so long to get back here? Ms. Little Pea, I think I love you. You make me laugh every time.

I think perhaps a Skype session between you and Jasper is needed. He's got the entertaining thing down, but I think he may be a bit confused. He thinks I'm supposed to entertain him!

Lady has taken on the role of heat sac (is that like a hot water bottle?) and Daisy pretty much has the sad dog look down (although, I must say that you have perfected that look).

Do you think your hooman will have a title tomorrow? :)

After reading what Karla said - Hi Mr. Rufus!

houndstooth said...

You sure have a lot of responsibilities! I'm glad I live in a multi-dog household and we can divvy up the duties. Actually, I'm retired from my first job and the therapy dog job is just a part time gig!

Bunny

Karen Friesecke said...

I loved your video, Miss GLP! You have quite a deep bark AND I did not realize how BIG you are!! Either that, or your Typist & Cushion are really small people :p

georgia little pea said...

@Melf - yes, a heat sac is like a hot water bottle except it's got grains in it and you heat it up in a microwave oven. it's heaven for any sore body part!

thank you for saying hi to Mr T! i'm sure he's happy to be remembered :)

@Karen - i am BIG [not fat okay?]. i weigh 43kgs [give or take some grams]. i am a wolfhound X [or so my adoption papers say].

my humans aren't the biggest people on the planet but they're bigger than Danny Devito. definitely. THANK YOU for watching my video!

pinkpixie786 said...

hi miss Georgia...it took me a while to get back here... my silly human wiped out my tracks in the blogosphere (sigh)... yar reaaly a dog to look up to with so many jobs and responsibilities... the stage 2 look reminds me of Cassie the Mutt when she's mediating... xoxox - Vanilla Bean

sonia a. mascaro said...

I think it is great your job: to entertain your humans!
I always love seeing your photos, Georgia. I would love to give many kisses on you.

Love your video "Don't you shush me". Its great to hear your bark and see you in action! Just amazing!

Bicontinental Dachshund said...

In the video, I don't understand why the Typist keeps shushing you. Is it the Typist? Now your Typist has taught my mom how to shush me, too. So I watched your fantastic video, and I understand all you say, so I started my batty barking to reply, but then it seemed we weren't really having a conversation or a dialogue. And then my mom shushed me. I mean, your video and my batty barking was like a conversation that happens in parallel or something. And on different continents. And then my mom kept shushing me. For real. Sounded just like in the video. So now I don't know what else to say, because there are a great number of things to say about your fab post, like how yucky the vegan chocolate cake sounds but how yummy it looks (and what a nice gesture for wapping an eye), like who are those figurines in your video next to the stairs, like how do you possibly keep up with all your many responsibilities in the home?

Kristine said...

That's a lot of jobs. How come my dog got off so easily? All she has to do is scare away creepy strangers. Which isn't even really a job that needs doing. We are going to have to do something about this.

You have definitely perfect the "sad face", GLP. I don't see how anyone could keep "disputing" after looking at an expression like that. Keep up the good work!

Kirsten (peacefuldog) said...

Vegan raw organic chocolate cake sounds pretty darn fab to me! The dogs wouldn't get any in my house either. Georgia, you are a clearly a lovely being devoted to selfless service. Your facial expressions reveal so much about your heart.

georgia little pea said...

@Tootsie - it's The Typist here. I just wanted you to know that whenever we play that video, Georgia will bark and run around looking for ...hmm... herself? She'd never tell you that because she wouldn't want you to know how silly she is but it's the truth. Shhh, okay?

The figurines by the staircase are angels. There are 2 of them and their names are Forgive and Forget. They were my birthday presents from The Other Half in the days before I started getting vacuum cleaners ;)

Swati said...

Oh, Georgia! I had the heartiest laugh a little while ago while I played the video. Puppy came running into the room and began to bark something in reply. (I think he's in love with you!) He's standing here as I type, looking at the laptop and wagging his tail eagerly. :)

Bicontinental Dachshund said...

Question: how come a post about job titles has no title? Oh, yes, the headache..of course!

Now Mom wants Forgive and Forget forgivereens, but we have no staircase in our Swiss home.

georgia little pea said...

You are too quick for me littledog Tootsie!

As a matter of fact, I DID have a title about job functions (smartie you) but when I read it (after doing the post), I couldn't understand it! Yeah that happens ;) - perhaps because of my headache or the midnight hour.

Anyway, I couldn't think of a simpler one ... and so I didn't :)

Helen P. said...

I did get your email yesterday! It was very nice for you to take a moment and write to me when stupid Blogger wasn't working the way it should. I'm glad that comments are working for you now, though! I hope it stays that way.

Keep waggin!
Helen

Amy said...

You are one busy girl! I hope you're being fairly compensated for all these responsibilities. I mean, a girl has to keep her energy up - you never know when a dispute might break out and your services will be required. Ty says he'd be happy to help you negotiate your contract. He's successfully worked out some very favorable terms in his arrangements with his people.

What Remains Now said...

I would have never guessed, but I'm not surprised that you have so many jobs. You handle them all with such grace, you make it look easy.

Pippa said...

Hello Georgia.
My name is Pippa. I have two blogs, OK well actually I have moved to WP from Blogger (and kept the blogger one) and I was reading a comment you made on Flo's about blogs so I thought I would come and visit. Actually Misery came to visit because of that, I came because there was some mention of chasing CATS! Which I am sure you forgot from your list of duties.
Now, Detective Pippa has been on the trail and noticed a couple of references which were familiar, Balmain and Bondi - from which we have deduced you may live somewhere in Sydney. My peeps used to live there in another life another century. Before we were all born.
I'll add you to my blogroll(s) so I can catch up with your adventures.

Pippa

georgia little pea said...

Hi Pippa. Thanks for coming by!

i try not to chase c.a.t.s. anymore because i'm looking to co-exist peacefully with them. also, i get treats when i don't chase them.

yes, we are in Sydney where it's raining every day this week. be very glad your family is no longer here.

hooroo till next time :)

Friko said...

I know what the title could be:

"My humans are working me to death".

Elizabeth said...

Oh, for the love of chocolate, GLP, I nearly peed my pants looking at your heat sac face! And then JF and Dewi got upset at your incessant barking and stomped all over my engorged lap and...GOTTA RUN!

georgia little pea said...

Geez pee wee. i hope you made it!

fabulousflo said...

OMG! That sad face would make Puss in Boots proud!

Kari in Vegas said...

nothing wrong with being an entertainer :)

Stop on by for a visit
Kari
http://dogisgodinreverse.com

sagechronicles said...

Oh, my. We have the barking entertainment down quite well, don't we GLP? You have some very important jobs though. Keep up the good work--maybe you'll get a raise!!

Greyhounds CAN Sit said...

Oh, funny:) Does sshhh mean bark, GLP? I think that's the first time we've actually seen you 'in person' and Frankie says to tell you he thinks you're really hot;) I don't know how you've got the energy to bark with all your jobs though. Frankie and Beryl don't have any jobs at all, apart from keep me sane. Sometimes that's a big ask:) Neither of them want to be my lap warmer:( Which is probably a good thing as I seem to spend most of my sitting down time at the computer, lol!