My name is Georgia Little Pea Ratatouille and if you could sniff my bum, this is what it might tell you...
I was adopted from a pound on March 26th 2009.
After great soul-searching and hours of googling, my humans settled on calling me Georgia because they thought it sounded like a name for a lady. I believe this is what is known as wishful thinking.
They gave me the middle name of Little Pea because I'm nothing like one.
And the last name of Ratatouille, either because I love food. Or *sigh* because I remind them of a rat they once saw in a movie.
Come January 26th, I will have had my name for 9 months. Some days, I even answer to it.
My humans believe that I'm just about 17 months old, which leaves 8 months of my life unaccounted for.
Of course I know where I was. But my humans never will.
These days, I live in a little house in a little village by the harbour of [apparently] the best little city in the world. It sounds idyllic but it's just suburbia.
I eat 2 kibble meals a day with meat and vege and fruit and yogurt and cheese and eggs. The really tasty stuff - like sun-baked squid, air-dried possum and flattened magpies - I find by myself on my walks.
I sleep on a fat doughnut princess bed that my human sewed up for me, with pretty little flowers on one side, pastel stripes on the other, and a long ribbon that I Am Not Allowed To Chew Ever.
I have learnt that it is bad, bad, BAD!!! to poop, pee, throw up or do smelly loud farts in the house, take my humans for a run when all they want to do is walk, nibble on cushions that used to belong to great grandma, steal chicken tikka rolls from the kitchen counter, yowl at the impertinent cats that sleep in the sun down the road, or get upset when other dogs bark at me, especially when they're little.
Also, I strongly suspect I'm not supposed to be driving the family car.
I am a Work-In-Progress. A Lady-In-Waiting. And now, thanks to yet another impetuous decision by my human... A Dog With A Blog.
If you're still reading this...my very first [and possibly last] post...thank you.
P.S. Now that you've read my bum, is there any chance you'll be my friend?
I might be Very Opinionated, but I'm NOT a little dog.
Luckily for little dogs, I'm kept on a Somewhat Short Leash.
Some truly fascinating facts about me are in my very first post "Hello, will you be my friend?"
Jordan Puff Piglet ??.??.????-09.02.2009 Adopted 29.10.2000
I never met Mr Piglet. He was Mr Thumper's housemate and best friend. He was clever, handsome, funny, strong and gentle. Also [apparently] perfect and a saint. I only came to live here because Mr Thumper got really sad after Mr Piglet went away. I always get compared to Mr Piglet.
Rufus B Thumper 30.04.2000-29.04.2011 Adopted 13.01.2001
My benefactor. He chose me to bring home out of all the dogs he met at the pound. He was already old and grumpy when I met him. Maybe if he'd been younger, he might have been my best friend. Mr Thumper was as big as a bear and had a very long tongue. He was very popular with the ladies and most other humans too. He's with Mr Piglet now.
My out-at-work human works hard to buy me nutritious food like lamb bones and lentils. He uses his Very Loud Voice only on my stay-at-home human which is why he's my favourite person in the world. He has a nice round soft tummy and is My Cushion of choice. *BREAKING NEWS* August 2012! My Cushion has left his job to be my full time Cushion! How lucky am I!
My stay-at-home human gets paid a lot of money to look after me. 100 dollars a week. She spends most of it on cream cakes and passionfruit tarts then wonders why she's getting fat. Strangely enough, she's also My Nutritionist.