c.c. Minister of The Environment
Dear Person In Charge of Farting Fluffing Dogs That Pass Gas Wind,
It has now been 3 days and nights since my doggy started passing gas and she still hasn't stopped.
Her Dr Dog says he's never heard of little blue pills making dogs fart before. And, as you know, we're very careful with what passes though her whiskered lips [though The Cushion did very misguidedly give her one [1] small dried lamb ear over the weekend]. It could be something she picked up at the park, but surely that's no fault of ours and the people who threw the rubbish there should be the ones made to suffer and not us. I'm sure you see the injustice of it all.
After having driven me to hide in the study on Sunday night, my doggy was kind enough to sleep downstairs on Monday night. Last night, we cleverly closed the bedroom door early so she couldn't get in! But she waited patiently in the guest room next door for more than 2 hours and when I opened the door, just a crack mind you, she pushed me aside to get in.
What was I supposed to do, Person In Charge? She's been so down lately, not herself really, I couldn't break her little determined heart.
There are now black suitcases under my eyes and I fear the fragrance hanging around my doggy's bottom and our hair can never be shampooed away.
Please oh please, Person In Charge, I beg of you! Help whatever is in my doggy's gut finish putrifying today and get dumped in the park [and picked up of course] so that we may all get some sleep tonight and not catch pneumonia.
Your divine intervention is all we can hope for now. [That, and Flagyl if it still hasn't cleared up by tomorrow.]
I thank you in advance and from the bottom of my anxious heart. Your supplicant who is turning blue in the face,
The Typist.
P.S. I am copying this to the Minister of Environment just in case he's interested in studying this [unfortunately] renewable source of energy.
I see from the photo that the wrong end of GLP is covered!
ReplyDelete-c at ddy.
What are the Little Blue Pills?? Our VET has ordered us to take an antacid tablet 1/2 hour before eating if we are on certain meds like steroids or certain antibiotics. Just sayin'.
ReplyDelete-Bart and Ruby
Chandra - you got that right!
ReplyDeleteBart and Ruby - the little blue pills are Macrolone, a corticosteroid anti-inflammatory which she's on for both her itching and the neck/leg pain. Cut down to 1/2 a day as of today! Yay! Antacid hmmm...good tip. I should have asked the vet if dogs can take charcoal pills.
Dear Typist,
ReplyDeleteIt's probably the stress of having to wear that hideous cone of shame last week that has Georgia's gut all torn up. It's probably all psychological and she'll need therapy to recover. Georgia Little Pea did not pay me to say this!
Bunny
I don't believe you, Ms Bunny! That sounds like a sponsored comment if ever I heard one. HAH!
ReplyDeleteI don't have any answers for any of you and I am sorry that I am laughing so hard, but gosh, That picture of you is the sweetest thing I have seen all day. So even if you are still (expressing) yourself, the cuteness will prevail.
ReplyDeleteI've got nothing to offer...except my deepest sympathy. I hope you get some relief soon. If not, I'll look forward to funny, in-the-middle-of-the-night posts.
ReplyDeletePlease let us know if you gets a resolution to the ruler of Noxious Fumes....we have been long suffering here in the jungle.
ReplyDeleteWe just found your blog in Blogville and cannot wait to follow :)
(possibly while wearing sniffer protection)
Sugar the Who
Dear Sugar the Who,
ReplyDeleteWelcome! Sorry you had to drop by on such a stinker of a day. I notice there's a Beans in your name. You DO know that's a big *ahem* for us farty dogs, right?
Hooroo for now! X
Poor Georgia - Cali has been trying to compete tonight (we have no idea what she could have eaten today to cause it - blech!). I hope you are feeling better soon and you all get some rest :)
ReplyDeleteIt's an established fact that people lose the ability to smell even the most noxious odors after they have been exposed to them for a period of time.
ReplyDeleteWe feel that you need to develop some patience. Three days is not long enough to develop this.
Sorry about the continuing "odor" issues. Activated charcoal "should" be okay for dogs, I used to give charcoal biscuits to my dog, Princess. Maybe some yoghurt might do the trick?
ReplyDeleteKaren - now that you mention it, I've seen charcoal bikkies at pet stores before and wondered why anyone would feed their dog that! The Pea does get yogurt with brekkie, though not every day. Thanks for the tips X
ReplyDeleteDear Euphenia -- Ben's shared a bit of your dilemma with me. I'm wondering if the solution is this: Perhaps you and The Cushion should change YOUR diets and become, like The GLP, more digestively expressive.
ReplyDeleteBlame it all on middle age. That's what I do.
Of course, you might have to find a new place to live out in the country -- preferably down wind from a sheep station or feed lot so the neighbors won't notice.
Just a thought.
Pungently yours,
The Queen
Oh Georgia, I do hope by the time you read this comment that Your Royal Flatulence will be back to her customary self. If not, can you get Forti-Flora down there? (It is only available through a vet here, but it is made by Purina I think so might be over-the-counter Down Under) - they are probiotics for the intestines, which help a lot.
ReplyDeleteI hope it clears up soon or Dr. Dog might have to - aaack - do a blood test to check your liver numbers.
You stay healthy, okay?
Like Bermtopia, I'm wondering about your neighbors. How do they deal with the smell?
ReplyDeleteIt may not be something she has eaten, but the meds unbalancing her intestine flora...
Jean - we used to give Rufus probiotic every morning for his weak gut. Then we read (probably on a blog) that it wasn't such a good thing to give (I don't really remember why). Sigh. Ms Pea's had 2 rounds of blood tests in the last 2 weeks, so let's hope she won't need a third :(
ReplyDeletepoor poochie, it must be a sore tummy to produce those smells for so long :( Have you tried adding a few drops of chammomile tea to the water bowl? Just dunk a chammomile tea bag in some hot water, leave it in til its cool then add some to the water bowl, it works wonders for my pups sensitive tum. Just try a little at first though, incase she doesnt get on with it. I checked with my vet and its safe for dog, good for tummy bugs, stress and even worms! Good luck!
ReplyDelete*poot poOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooot*
ReplyDeleteYou are a magnificent farter! Me, too!
ReplyDeleteKeep on wagging - it will help spread the goodness around.
How is your neck and leg? I hope it is all better.
:)
Okays, I has no clue why her is still fartin'...mysteries of da unknown. But I do think it might be a goodplan to can da farts and make them useful somehows like...to start da fire so you nots catch NEWMONIA, maybe a gas source furs da car, to blow up da cone of shame and makes it go kaboom. Oh am I a genious or what? Don't answer dat.
ReplyDeleteYou knows, awhile back me and my brudder was on charcoal pills cuz we gotted REALLY sick and was poopin' blood (I know you wanted to knows dat).
Nows I was lookin' at da above foto of Georgia and well...I think you really should let her gets some much needed sleep cuz I am sure her is exhausted...hehehehehehe.
Puddles
Lulu - hi there! Thanks for the tip. I have cham tea and I love a natural solution. Will try that. If she stil farts, at least it might smell better :)
ReplyDeletePudds - you are incorrigible! So charcoal is definitely good. Glad you don't have bloody poop any more. That's the worst.
Oh no......the gas hasn't passed!! Hopefully a resolution will be reached soon.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry for the lack of sympathy, but this is a Greyhound household. You don't have one of them until you own shares in Glade air fresheners!
ReplyDeleteDeccy - what are you saying? Greyhounds are notorious farters? Because I'm part greyhound too! Blimey.
ReplyDeleteI would suggest a pro-biotic, that will help reinstall the good bacteria in her intestines as opposed to the ones currently lurking there. :-)
ReplyDeleteYuck. I can't believe she's still having issues after several days. Brutal. Other than imbibing something nasty, I have no idea what could cause such an issue! Good luck with that. :-P
ReplyDeleteGood grief, there are times when wind is just not appreciated! Feel just awful for you all, I'm sure no one is comfy this week.
ReplyDeleteHope you can clear the air of the problem very, very soon!
Hi Pea, it's the Team here, if you really want to get Typist and Cushion to vacate - diet of fresh roo meat'll do the trick! Just hope you don't have a belly-ache with it all old girl :) keep us up-to-date won't you?
ReplyDeleteOh, oh, so sorry for their rudeness - um, I was going to say Typist, the charcoal treatment, but oh dear me, I do hope it all ends soooooon.
Hugs Rose
xx
Beryl would have you know that not all Greyhounds are incorrigible farters, lol! And she thinks Deccy probably farts enough for both of them:)
ReplyDeleteCan't help at all, GLP. Was going to suggest yoghurt, too late to be first;)
Personally I reckon it's some sort of backlash to the arrival of the kindel!
BOL!!! HAHAHAHA!! I am laughing and so is my mom! Sorry, we are trying not to get enjoyment over this very stinky situation, but we can't help it!!!!!!
ReplyDelete~Higgins